Monday 29 October, 2007

In praise of editors

The original version of a story called 'One More Thing' by Raymond Carver:

'LD put the shaving bag under his arm again and once more picked up the suitcase. "I just want to say one more thing, Maxine. Listen to me. Remember this," he said. "I love you. I love you no matter what happens. I love you too, Bea. I love you both." He stood there at the door and felt his lips begin to tingle as he looked at them for what, he believed, might be the last time. "Good-bye," he said.

"You call this love, LD?" Maxine said. She let go of Bea's hand. She made a fist. Then she shook her head and jammed her hands into her coat pockets. She stared at him and then dropped her eyes to something on the floor near his shoes.

It came to him with a shock that he would remember this night and her like this. He was terrified to think that in the years ahead she might come to resemble a woman he couldn't place, a mute figure in a long coat, standing in the middle of a lighted room with lowered eyes.

"Maxine!" he cried. "Maxine!"

"Is this what love is, LD?" she said, fixing her eyes on him. Her eyes were terrible and deep, and he held them as long as he could.'

Here is the edited version:

'L.D. put the shaving bag under his arm and picked up the suitcase.

He said, "I just want to say one more thing."

But then he could not think what it could possibly be.'

Would Raymond Carver have been better if he'd managed to resist the aggressive editing inflicted on him by his first editor? It seems the answer is 'no'. Editors are important. I thought so when I was one, and I still think so, now that I'm being edited. I think Amanda Brett, my editor at Text has made (is making) my novel much better. (Though I'm no Raymond Carver.)

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